HEIDI – noun. Greeting.

HIRE YEW – Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.
Usage: Heidi, hire yew?

BARD – verb. Past tense of the infinitive “to borrow.”
Usage: “My brother bard my pickup truck.”

MUNTS – noun. A calendar division.
Usage: “My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck and I ain’t herd from him in munts.”

THANK – verb. Ability to cognitively process.
Usage: “Ah thank ah’ll have a bare.”

BARE – noun. An alcoholic beverage made of barley, hops, and yeast.
Usage: “Ah thank ah’ll have a bare.”

RANCH – noun. A tool used for tight’nin’ bolts.
Usage: “I thank I left my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago.”

ALL – noun. A petroleum-based lubricant.
Usage: “I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck.”

FAR – noun. A conflagration.
Usage: “If my brother from Jawjuh don’t change the all in my pickup truck, that thing’s gonna catch far.”

TAR – noun. A rubber wheel.
Usage: “Gee, I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don’t git a flat tar in my pickup truck.”

TIRE – noun. A tall monument.
Usage: “Lord willin’ and the creek don’t rise, I sure do hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime.”

RETARD – Verb. To stop working.
Usage: “My grampaw retard at age 65.”

FAT – noun, verb. 1. a battle or combat.
2. to engage in battle or combat.
Usage: “You younguns keep fat’n, n’ ah’m gonna whup y’uh.”

RATS – noun. Entitled power or privilege.
Usage: “We Southerners are willin’ to fat for are rats.”

FARN – adjective. Not local.
Usage: “I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed….
mus’ be from some farn country.”

DID – adjective. Not alive.
Usage: “He’s did, Jim.”

EAR – noun. A colorless, odorless gas: Oxygen.
Usage: “He cain’t breathe….give ‘im some ear!”

BOB WAR – noun. A sharp, twisted cable.
Usage: “Boy, stay away from that bob war fence.”

JEW HERE – Noun and verb contraction.
Usage: “Jew here that my brother from Jawjuh got a job with that bob war fence cump’ny?”

HAZE – a contraction.
Usage: “Is Bubba smart?” “Nah….haze ignert.
He ain’t thanked but a minnit ‘n ‘is laf.”

SEED – verb, past tense of “to see”.

VIEW – contraction: verb and pronoun.
Usage: “I ain’t never seed New York City….view?”

GUMMIT – Noun. A bureaucratic institution.
Usage: “Them gummit boys shore are ignert.”

You’re such a HUGE perv. I’m like Tulip, dreaming about not being able to run fast enough, teeth falling out… not if I have an ugly cooter. LOL
Only you. Dirt bag.